Marathon Training Sucks

I suppose this late-night confession is witness to my mental burnout. Training throughout the first 9 weeks was rocky at best, with these latter 9 weeks being a mental and physical . The shin splint in my left leg definitely proved to be the nail in the coffin that took me from running an 8:00-8:30/pace to hoping I can jog/hobble/walk my way through the race w/o causing serious injury. It hasn't been pretty - no sir.

Is it too soon to formally (and perhaps frustratingly) announce that I am not developed enough mentally or physically as an athlete to handle the marathon never plan to run a marathon ever again? I EASILY handled training for a 5k, 10k, 15k and half marathon with nooooo troubles what-so-ever. However, the second I crested 14 miles in marathon training the shit hit the fan. Coincidentally (or not), the only other marathon I (over)trained for was identically self-sabotaged thanks to an inopportune injury from a 14-miler.

I didn't want to run. I couldn't find a groove. I stopped enjoying the training. The physical payoff was far less satisfying. My body composition shifted from that of being taught(ish) and a bit over-muscled (for someone who swims/bikes/runs regularly), to a little soft (muscle dissipating), weaker and just less POSITIVE feeling in general. Longer runs replaced shorter runs/bikes  and abs/weights, which meant less variety and a quicker path to my burn-out. I also haven't played tennis in almost two months, which is UNHEARD of for me.

Bottom line? This sucks.

The "off-season" can't come soon enough. Winter, dare I say it, can't come soon enough.

Why? Because then I can retreat back into base-training, mentally and physically. We can start small and gradually build the confidence back, gradually build the strength back and slowly start to set our sights on the following season's goals (unlike currently where my goals seem to be doing something akin to this, where I'm the camera).

I like pushing the pace on the treadmill. I like the sting of cold air in my lungs. I like running HARD, or pushing myself to suffer more and MORE on the bike. I like pulling up to the wall in the pool, checking my watch and gasping for air. I sure as hell ain't fast, but damnit I know how to suffer and that's half the fun for me - diving deep into a pit of suffering and persevering each time, climbing back out.

That's probably enough - you/I get the point. I'm done with marathons.

I miss triathlons. I miss negative splits. I miss running when my quads feel like lead or biking when my calves feel like rubber-band balls. Hell, I even miss jumping into an f'ing pool in the middle of winter - and that says A LOT! While out on long runs, I find myself longing for... geez... standing up on the bike-trainer in a high-gear and counting to 100 pedal strokes to simulate hill-work.

Looking forward, I start thinking about all of the triathlons I'd love to sign up for next year and damnit it makes me excited again. I'd love to come back to DC and do the Nation's Triathlon (my very first triathlon). There are also a ton of great Sprints in the area, not to mention the NYC Tri, which is supposed to be a great course (i.e. fast) or the Lake George Tri right in my area here. These are all things that I have been deprived of due to my marathon training.

Like a baby that has cried itself out, I suddenly find myself overwhelmingly tired and without further thoughts. Goodnight.